This Weekend's Eats

I've been gluten-free for nearly 3 months now!  I can't believe I put it off for so long because I've found that I'm really into the dietary self-discipline it brings.  Despite having had not one but TWO stomach bugs (or one nasty stomach bug that reared its head twice in as many weeks, as my doctor suspects) AND a cold in the same timespan, I am generally feeling better being off the wheat/flour/bread/beer.


These are the benefits I note:

1. No post-meal bloating or embarrassing tummy tunes.

2. I have eaten more fruits and vegetables in the past 3 months than perhaps I did all of last year.

3. I have become more aware of what I eat and how it affects me.  I am trying to eat more simply, to eat foods that are less processed and more natural.  I am getting closer to my food.

4. I can still have all the wine I want!  Beer, who needs ya?

5. I have lost 10 lbs.  (This is not entirely good, as now I need to buy new jeans--something I haven't done in about 7 years.  Maybe it's time to pull the trigger on this pair that I've been stalking for a while?)

6. As one who has a hard time making a decision when confronted with too many options on a menu (in a store..., in life generally...), I can now suss out the gluten-free offerings and relish the ease of my dinner decision almost being made for me!  Also, I can always have a salad, and this has started making me happy.  Go, salads!

7. Macarons.  All the macarons I want!

That said, part of cutting out gluten was to boost my general immunity and it turns out I am just getting over a cold.  But I think it probably takes longer than 3 months to truly take one's immunity to the next level.  I was getting a cold nearly every other month so I had 4 healthy, cold-free months this time.  If not eating gluten can help me to stretch the time between colds, then I am happy.  Besides, I was running around like crazy, traveling, and stressed out over major life things.  Sometimes a cold virus comes a-knockin' and there ain't nothing that can keep it out.

I spent this weekend cooking and even doing a little baking.  It's never as much fun cooking for one, but that didn't stop me.

My first attempt at gluten-free baking:  peanut butter-banana-chocolate chip cookies.  Lo and behold, they are VEGAN, too.  (That's like 10 extra points.  Toward what, I don't know?)  The recipe was quite simple, and the cookies were wonderful--moist and banana-y with a good crumb.  I put half of the dough in the freezer to use later, but when I ran out of cookies this morning it was promptly dispatched to the oven for more cookies.  Now that I've had these cookies, I realize I cannot be without.

(You can find the recipe here.  I am in love with this website already.)

Friday night's dinner was smoked pork sausage and potato-cabbage colcannon.  I found the loveliest petite head of cabbage, which was perfectly sized for one.  The outer leaves were a pale green, but inside it was yellow and filled with hardy sprouts and stalks that were the color of cauliflower.  It was like a hybrid cabbage/brussels sprout/cauliflower veg, and it was perfectly everything for everybody (me).

Yesterday I was strolling around the Etienne Marcel/Rue Montorgueil area, availing myself of the lovely markets (and the cute boutiques on Rue Tiquetonne) when I found myself with arms full of asparagus, radishes, and the most charming grapefruit-sized heads of butter lettuce my eyes ever did see.  (As I was washing them, I thought how darling these leafy babies were, all wrapped together like a hug.  That's right, butter lettuce = a hug.  [Washing lettuce makes me nuttier than usual, apparently.])  I grabbed some scallops and an ashy goat's cheese, and went home to get to it.  The second picture doesn't do my dinner justice, so you can focus on the one of the bright salad with tomatoes and radishes and the aforementioned goat's cheese.  But I assure you, the scallops were divine.

And look at these little radish mice!  The produce cuteness don't quit!

What's Been Happening

Argh.  I still have many more China photos to post.  Most of them are cued up and ready, I just have to give you my shrewd yet witty commentary.  (Why else do you come here?)  But since I'm not up for that tonight, I'll tell you what the hell else has been going on.  In list form.


1.  I was in Sweden last weekend!  It snowed!  Yes, it was Easter!  OK, the snow didn't really stick, but it was the principle of it all.  And it was c-c-cold.  Certainly too cold to take my gloves off and use my touch-activated phone to take photos.  So either I'm going to have to get an old-fashioned push-button camera or there will be no outdoor photos from Sweden 9 months out of the year.


2.  I fell ill with another dastardly stomach bug.  The can't-eat-anything kind.  B tried to tell me that it could be because I was in a new country and not used to the diet there.  I dropped the First World-Westernized card on him and that was that.  It seems the cause was either the fluffy buckwheat crepe (What kind of crepe is fluffy?  This was more like a soufflé... those menu liars!) served with some caviar was not made entirely of buckwheat (a gluten glitch, if you will) or that the scallops I ate were bad.  (Also, bad on me for snarfing down the crepe-flé, but after spooning the caviar directly into my mouth, I decided it really needed a vehicle and flour be damned.)  But the stomach trouble lasted too long to be food poisoning or gluten trickery so the real reason is probably just that I have a terrible digestive system.  But that's news to no one, certainly!


3.  The only good thing about being under the digestive weather is congee.  Oh, congee.  Sometimes even just the smell of it is enough to make me feel better.  I always wrote it off as that weird bland gruel on the breakfast buffet of every Asian hotel I'd ever stayed at.  But when there is no food that wants to stay in your system but you are hungry, oh so very hungry, and you are presented with a bowl of this broken rice porridge, it is the MOST DELICIOUS THING YOU HAVE EVER TASTED EVEN MORE SO IF MADE WITH CHICKEN BROTH HOLY MOLY CHICKEN BROTH IT'S ALMOST LIKE EATING A FREAKING STEAK.

Yeah, congee is soothing and delicious and is just the trick to turn some stomach troubles around.  And, once you're feeling better, you can flavor it in so many ways--with pork or seafood or with an egg stirred in or all spicy-like.  You can doctor it up however you like!  I want to try a sweet version next.  I just need some willing American to smuggle me some maple syrup...

Anyway, you can read more about congee here.  But trust me, it's the steak of diarrhea cures.  Mmm-mmm.


4.  Two of the most darling people in the world are coming to visit tomorrow!  I keep having those little frissons of excitement knowing that they are almost here, much like a kid does before Christmas.  This weekend is going to be great.  My Santa Clauses are on their way!


5.  Cochino is acting weird and is not-so-little around the middle these days.  And her pupils are dilated way too often.  And last night she bit me--twice--and kept mewing at me like she didn't want me to sit on the bed.  (Hey cat, it's my bed.  I bought it.  And there are plenty of other humans on this earth who wouldn't let you sleep on theirs, much less up by the pillows, so shush it.)  I hope I am being hypochondriacal, but I think it wouldn't hurt to take her to a vet.  So stay tuned for a French vet adventure.  I think it might go something like this:  your cat is fine (you are crazy), please pay me 300 euros.

Oh god, please don't let it cost 300 euros.  There goes my Chanel nail polish budget.

Ch-Ch-China

Sometimes I am sparse with the updates for no good reason, but I've got an excuse this time.  I've been in China, where they make it really hard for you to work on your silly little blog.  Thankfully I am able to access my company's server in Paris so I can dance around their controls, but it makes for an infinitesimal lagtime (sometimes I can count up to 10 seconds before the letter I've struck appears on the screen--which makes for a fun "Memory" or "Count-'em-down" sort of typing game!) and my arse hurts at the mere thought of uploading a photo.

So I will wait for the photo updates until I'm home this weekend, at which point I will be no doubt super J-lagged and barely able to grunt at the cat much less string a sentence for this here thing.  So you've been warned.  But I give you a briefing on the trip as it was this time:

1. I am proud to say I am still gluten-free.  There were moments (mostly at the disgusting Beijing fabric fair) when I thought that if a Papa John's pizza  fell (from the grimey girders) into my lap, I would have polished it off with no problem.  But I am proud to say I was steadfast and spent 12 dumpling-free days in China.  If I don't fall ill with something-or-other after this germy time, I will know that my immune system has been duly fortified.  As someone without a severe gluten allergy, it's pretty easy to be off the gluten in China.  No dumplings, no excessive amounts of soy sauce (I am no saint), no deep-fried/"breaded"
 things, and no beer.  So really, it's been all-rice, all-the-time.  And a fried pigeon here and there.  But no Jew's ear.  Nuh-uh. Only for pictures, I swear.

2. It's been a clean-up on aisle Marni over here.  I wasn't that into the H&M-Marni collection when it came out, mostly because I was put off by the frenzy of it all.  Maybe it's because I knew I could never get a piece--even with a boyfriend who works at H&M.  That shizz was gone in seconds!  But I thought maybe I'd take a gander in Shanghai... and, sure enough, there it all was!  Hanging unpreturbed!  And... ON SALE.  I got a pair of shoes (made in Portugal, no less) and a silk dress and a silk blouse.  But the best part was I had the time to browse, try things on, and think it over before I made my purchases, on sale, with a discount.  OK, now I'm just rubbing it in.  And when I got to Beijing, there was even MORE there.  Like accessories!  So I have a few extra plastic necklaces earmarked for a few lovely ladies that I know.  But if you are dying for one (not the fancy leaf one, though...), send me an email. 

3. I've been to Beijing twice now, so it's doubly confirmed I find it dirtier, uglier (Except for the Olympic Stadium, it really is what any new stadium should be judged against--damn all those retro-style stadiums built in the past 10 years in the US.  They turn my stomach.  But this is not the time for a stadium rant, though I am good for it.), slower (Because. The. Traffic. Is. Painfully. Awfully.  Horribly.  *cough*  Slow.  And. You.  Can. *fumes*  Get.  Nowhere.  Fast.), and harder to manage than Shanghai.  Sure, Shanghai is all tall buildings and loud expats from Oz and light shows and over-priced scene-y dinners, but it is much more modern and (dare I say?) civilized than Beijing.  I mean, I get stared at hard in Beijing.  And try taking a taxi as a solo Western woman... I thought the one taxi driver was going to strain his neck all the times he kept turning to stare at me. 

4. I think I might like Yunnan food the most of all of the regional Chinese food I've had.

5. Today we went to the Summer Palace (where I was inappropriately dressed for the windy cold weather and spent most of the time shivering and fantasizing about all of the things in my suitcase layered to encase my body) and then (after a stop back at the hotel, which thanks to the Beijing traffic was no quick jaunt) to the Great Wall.  Yes, I went to the freaking GREAT WALL OF CHINA today!  Woop!  And it was really something.  I will write more about it later when I am over my impending jetlag and can do it properly.  I don't know when I'll be back in Beijing (not soon, if I can help it), so I jumped on the opportunity to go.  I think it's the only one of the Seven Wonders I've seen.  And, yeah, it's a wonder alright.

6.  Damn you, pink puppy.  You had no excuse holding out on me this time.  Your mom and dad no doubt wonder what the deal is with the girl in the red-and-black coat craning into their newsstand every day.  Please come out and play next time!   

7.  What would I do without my Kindle?  (T R-P, I am forever grateful for your encouragement.)  It really is the best dinner/lunch/breakfast partner a traveling lady could ask for.  I finished the Paris Wife, which despite my initially snobbery, was a fun read.  I've put off The Sisters Brothers so I can read some of Nancy Mitford's historical stuff.  Madame de Pompadour, I'm smitten!  I can't wait to be back on your bourgeois stomping grounds tomorrow!

G-Free

That's it, gluten.  This is your stop.

I am continuing on without you.

Sure, that test came back years ago telling me you weren't a problem.  But the more I read, the more nefarious I understand you are.  You may not trigger the test results against you, but you can still cause a world of problems.  And don't think I didn't notice that the problems people claim you cause are myriad--from skin issues to digestive problems (duh) to weight gain to weight loss to depression to migraines to immunity problems.  And these are just the biggies.  But they were always too widespread, too catch-all for me.  I'd read enough to find that many people who seem to have a problem just lay it on you, gluten.

Which is why I waited so long.

That and that I never felt it was a good time.  So much of who I am is eating, trying new things, indulging without restraint when it comes to what I ingest.  But I have finally decided to take a new route.  But not one that will diverge too terribly from my old one.  And maybe that's why I decided to finally go for it.

Wait, but first I will tell you what I hope to gain, you old bugger.

I am sick all of the time.  I have a cold/sinus infection every other month.  I say this assuredly because I can count back every month-and-a-half and tell you when my having a cold put a real damper on a party or a visit or some other thing that I would have been into had I not felt I'd been run over by a truck.  Sure, I'm not a teenager anymore... nor am I 80 years old, which is how I feel for about a week every other month.  Hey gluten, that is bullshit, plain and simple.  My primary doctor and my ENT can find nothing real wrong with me.  I take my vitamin C and probiotics and have tried lots of other homeopathic immune-boosters.  But maybe it's you?  If asked to describe myself these days, the word "immunocompromised" is at the top of this list.  And that's not fair.

The other part of it is the digestive problems.  Sure, I've got a "funny tummy" or what big-people describe as IBS.  It's become borderline embarrassing these days. Oh, the noises!  I want to wear a t-shirt that says, "I promise, that noise did not just come from my butt."  Because it often sounds like they do!  (Ha-ha, gluten.)  But really, it's just funny digestive noises.  I swear it!  (OK, that's not all it is, but that's all I will discuss here.)  Lots of the fun of IBS is finding what triggers it by limiting your diet until you find the catalyst.  (This is not actually fun at all, you realize.)  And, yeah, there's been lots of finger pointing at you, gluten, so why not start here?

But what really made me OK to do this, to cut you out of my life and to start today?  There are so many foods I CAN eat!  Like, macarons!  Hey gluten, macarons are super-awesome and delicious--WITHOUT YOU!  And so is steak tartare.  And frites.  And any fish.  And any vegetable.  And eggs!  And quinoa.  And rice.  And Swedish meatballs.  Really, the biggest bugaboo is bread.  And that's just because I've been lazy.  But it's just as easy to find a salad for lunch.  Or sushi.  Or a magret de canard and some damn mashed potatoes.  Oh, and cheese.  I can eat cheese, did I mention that?

So gluten, this is where you get off.  I'm taking control of my diet.  I'm limiting my choices, and I'm going to eat more fruits and vegetables.  Am I going to miss sandwiches?  And regular pizza?  And not thinking about what I order?  At least at first.  But hopefully I will see enough benefit not to regret it.